Space

Is it just me or are "space" and "race" intrinsically linked?


Example

I pull up to the ATM and an elderly white gentleman is standing next to it. He motions for me to go ahead with my transaction. I look at him like he's the anti-christ. Please sir, I need a modicum of privacy and you standing there isn't helping. Besides, who walks up to the drive-thru ATM? I just pulled off.

Example

When I went to order breakfast the other day a white cutie co-worker simply stepped to the side so that I could order. Out elbows were almost touching. I shot him a "I need 4-5 feet" look and he smiled, while maintaining his oblivious look, and remained one step away from me.

Example

When shopping and manuevering through close aisles another black woman saw me coming and we both eased our purses off of our shoulders to make more space to pass each other. When I passed her daughter moments later, she simply stepped to the side to make room for me to pass (even though we probably both could have made it).

Example

Going out for drinks with co-workers. The greetings vary widely. I can expect overwhelmingly tight and sometimes lingering hugs from friends of my white female co-workers. If I meet another black person/couple a warm smile and half-wave is perfectly acceptable.

Conclusion

I don't even approach hovering range when other people are taking care of any kind of personal transaction. I go out of my way to do all sorts of Matrix antics in order to avoid any kind of booty rub, arm graze, pelvic brush when working in a close space with a co-worker. I thought that was standard practice. My disclaimer: I'm not one of those people that shies away from the human touch. I just think that you should know my first, middle, and last name first. There are some instances in which I've broken that rule, but they are far and few in between. I just really need people to give me slightly more space.