Change

I haven't had a post in ages, because things have been super stressful. Those of you who follow the blog can remember this time last year and my lofty plan to not renew my lease and move to DC.

Well...that didn't work out.

Not only did it not work out, but I fell in love with my job (finally) and no matter what I applied for, I ended up not getting it.

The stress re-entered somewhere around November and I finally got to a point where I couldn't write anymore. Every post would have sounded exactly the same. Discouraged.

After really doing some praying, I realized that being here was a blessing and I needed to let go and enjoy my time.

I had one other super important interview that didn't result in anything and I had decided to just stay for another year.

Well...I'm officially going to stop getting in the way of my blessings. Because in two weeks everything changed.

Tuesday: LC spotted a position that he thought would be a good fit and sent me the link. The position had been posted for just a few hours, so I applied.

Wednesday: They called for a phone interview.

Thursday: They scheduled an in-person interview.

Tuesday: I went to the interview.

Thursday: They made an offer that I could not refuse.

So, after 5 years....My last day is in 3 weeks.

......

My first day is in 4 weeks...the same day that my lease expires.

I left DC (and LC) eight years ago and next month I will finally move back. I'm excited to start a new chapter of my professional and personal life, with a man that I love immensely. I've learned more than I thought I would in that time and I actually accomplished my dream of living in NYC.

Getting here has been a journey and I'm so excited for the support along the way.

I finally decided what I want to do about my blog and I think a refresh is in order. Stay Tuned for the next phase of Dani Colored Glasses.

Define "Regular"

Last week I was watching the news in the morning and I saw a story that made me wish I wasn't in my apartment alone.

I needed someone else to look at incredulously. The story actually got me so fired up, I sat around for another 30 minutes to watch it again.

Summary:

The police, acting on a hunch, went into a neighborhood to look for a stash of drugs. They spot a young man who breaks out running. Not sure why he's running, the police run after him and they all end up in his house. They ask him to open the door, they got no response so they knocked down the door.

One shot is fired and the boy ends up dead.

According to the police, they thought they heard a weapon.

Later, it was found that there was no weapon on the boy, and he was just trying to dispose of his weed.

Cue the obligatory shot of his crying mother and aunt.

His mother then turns to the camera and describes her deceased son.

Saying, "[He's] like a regular kid, he's like you know, just like any other kid. You know you have kids who get in trouble, simple other stuff. But he wasn't that bad, he wasn't a bad kid. Not the kind of kid who carries guns around and slings no guns, he's not that type of kid."

Then she says the only drug he had was marijuana.

The mother is outraged. The community is now demanding answers.

Ummm....

Yes, the loss of a life is tragic. Especially, when he didn't threaten the life of anyone else. Yes, there is seemingly an increase in the instances of the police acting outside of protocol.

However....

Since when do "regular kids" run from the cops and flush weed? Where was the community outrage at the kids having/selling drugs on their block in the first place?

Before I honed in on the story and I just heard the lede audio of the mother's cries, I was ready for her to say, my son was in the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing and he was killed senselessly. I was not ready for the mother to say, "yes...my son had drugs (that is still illegal right?)....and yes he ran from the police....and yes he ignored requests to open the door...but how could he end up dead?"

Maybe its just me.

When you just know....

I'm reminded daily of why I shouldn't have snipers at my disposal.

"Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer isn't exactly impressed with President Obama's toughness, calling him "thin-skinned" following their contentious exchange at a Phoenix airport on Wednesday."

Ok..I'm kidding about the snipers. But really....what other job allows you to publicly speak ill of your boss and not face any consequences?

Was Dad In Love?

BK's finest and harlem transplant Dani posed an interesting question in her Clutch mag article yesterday. She asked, "What did you wish your father had told you about love?" My answer popped in my mind instantly. I wish my dad had said that he was in it. Love that is.

When I was younger, my dad talked about how he and my mom met. I've heard him say that he loved my mom. I've never heard him say that he was in love.

The vulnerability that comes with being love is something that I wish I had seen from him as I grew into my own adulthood. The fact that you can feel something that encompasses you fully and orders your thoughts and actions is something that I think we all comprehend...at least conceptually.

How many of us can talk about seeing that in older love.

Thankfully, I can experience that watching my grandfather, but it would have been great to have experienced that from my father.

I hope that the man that I marry doesn't completely lose that feeling of being "in love." More importantly, I hope that if we have kids, they know what its like to hear their father talk about being "in love" firsthand.

Riddle Me This...

Picture This:

A rice cake in the toaster oven with one slice of cheese on top of it.

On the counter, there is a whole cucumber, a package of cherry tomatoes, and a tin of tuna fish.

I glanced at the scene trying to figure out if it was a puzzle of some sort. Then my co-worker bustles into the pantry, checks the timer, and heads back to his desk.

Umm...What is he making for lunch?

According to my libra chatmate, he's making a sandwich....I really think he's just getting ready for an iron chef audition.

Thoughts

1. I am convinced my neighbor faces our adjoining wall, with her phone to her ear, and has all of her conversations. I can hear her breathe, I promise.

2. After 20 months of dating (and a plan to live together) I realized, in passing, that I've been using the wrong zip code for LC's place. I've been using the zip code for my undergrad dorm and NOT the one he gave me when we first started dating. I found out I had wrong zip code AFTER i ordered mailing labels for him. The funny thing is I can't remember ever using the right one.

3. The air at work is super tense. I think our parent company has put some ultimatums out there about business and the executives are scramble to execute it. Its the nature of our business, but the first time I'm actually in the corporate office as its happening.

4. This is my serious job hunt question...should I be using my soon-to-be DC address when applying for jobs? I want to be as forthright as possible, but I'm getting the feeling that companies are not comfortable with the prospect of a relocation.

5. Speaking of jobs...the company that I have not worked for in over a year still owes me back payment. I'll finally take LC's advice and get serious about rectifying that, I didn't want to burn that bridge, but I need to get this taken care of post haste.

6. My passport expires in May. Sigh. Ok...here's the thing. I'm in a serious relationship. Am I engaged? No. Are we working toward that? Absolutely.
Renewing my passport right now, when my last name could change in a few years just offends my cheapness. Why can't I file for a year or 2 extension?

7. Speaking of filing. I went to TaxAct to start my filing process and apparently I can't file my state taxes for free. I'm from FL where state tax lore is something passed down from generation to generation in hushed tones. Last year, because my filing was complicated I let H&R block handle my taxes. It saved me my sanity but cost waaaay more than I want to spend. This year, things are more simplified and I just want to do it myself.

8. LC gave me this gem during the NFL playoff game. I asked him if he wanted me to call him after the game. He said, "no you don't have to....I may zone out, but just keep talking."

.....
..
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*Blank Stare*

Mergers and Acquisitions

I'm not a good friend merger. I've never had the finesse to seamlessly bring different groups of people together. I'm even worse when it comes to combining friends and the significant other.

Am I over thinking it all? Probably.

The reality is however that its never gone well.

For instance my friends and I have a standing "get there and you have somewhere to stay" routine. We've perched on couches, blow-up mattresses, etc.

However, the other half has a standing get a hotel room and be comfortable routine.

Yes we're older, but geesh that totally changes my budgeting. LOL.

That's an in jest example, but I suppose the bigger subject is that relationships do have an affect on friendships. Navigating them both can be difficult.

I'm trying to figure that all out.