This Time

I miss you…

Ran into you yesterday
Memories rushed through my brain
it started to hit me
now you're not with me

I realized I made a mistake

It took a certain willingness to part with certainty and delve into seeming insanity to get to this part of my life. I suppose by definition that could be most akin to faith.

My biggest character flaw is complacency. I seek it out and once I find it I snuggle in it until the spirited parts of my personality are beyond recognition. I used my downtime today to reflect on the changes that are happening in my life. In that reflection, I realized that I'm not struggling to hold on to what I’ve been working to achieve. I’m struggling to move past the achievement.

I thought I needed some space
But I just let love go to waste

I need to be hungry, but fed at the same time. I don’t know how to keep the hunger at the intensity that it used to be, without going with-out.

I know, however, that without the prosperity I experienced over the last five months I would have imploded.

My hunger is fed by the promise of a feast. To go without a taste of food, prosperity, achievement, or success diminishes my hunger greatly. I won’t want what I can’t envision for myrself.

It's so crystal clear now
that I need you here now

I’ve got some really important decisions to make.

When I think about January 15th - March 15th vs. June 15th - September 15th I’m humbled. Truly.

It takes a lot to realize that wanting something isn’t enough. It takes even more to realize that you just weren’t ready for the next step.

Something inside of me stepped out of my own shadow and walked in faith. That walk led me to my first set of blessings, but threw me for a loop at the same time.


I was prepared for professional success and got handed personal success.

Now, everything that I thought would be crystal clear in my work life isn’t so clear.

What I thought would be a new beginning in a new book, ended up being a new chapter in a book that I never put down.

So I’m once again humbled by the realization that I’m not where I thought I’d be, but not where I once was.

I gotta get you back today….
This time I want it all

It’s time to get back to work. It’s time to get back to the woman who walked this far. I feel the complacency coming, but I’ve got to keep moving. I’ve gotta get her back. Today.