Premature

You know when you're with someone and everything feels scarily right?
The point where you start to kind of think past where you are and you start to think about where you could be....with that person?
Then you start formulating hypothetical questions to gauge how this person would fit into your ideals/ideas about forever?
Then you take those answers and feelings, sit back and wait for either the bottom to fall out or something magical to happen?
Yea.....

Unfortunately or fortunately (depending on your role) marriage and families got real popular about three years ago. I mean really. TLC, WE, Oxygen all weddings. Everytime I turn around someone is making some sort of announcement and/or there is an invite that screams weddings and/or baby.

Sidebar: I hope getting married and having a kid are still popular activities when I get to that point. Especially the having a kid part. I'll be past pissed if all the cute things for women just dries up and when I'm expecting pregnant women are back to wearing potato sacks, with tired strollers, and no paid maternity leave. Rant over.

I'm happy for everyone that has gotten to the point in their life in which they are engaged, married, trying, with child, and/or holding said child. Truly, this isn't a 'hate' post. It's just gotten increasingly difficult to just date someone and not thinking about the bigger things.

The bigger things have seemingly engulfed everything!

For instance: LC likes to work out and his dedication to the gym has reminded me that I should get off my duff and work out too (his motivation and blogger dani's gentle chiding...Love her for it).

However, yesterday when I thought about why I really wanted to get back in the gym I realized it was less about general vanity and all of a sudden I was thinking things like: wanting to look fab in a wedding dress, wanting to be healthier to stave off pregnancy complications, wanting to have a better chance of losing baby weight blah, blah, blah!!!!!!!!!!!!

What the hell happened to wanting to look cute for a party in a few weeks?

Where is my brain (and more importantly) can I get it back?????

Something happened after 25 and I feel like my subconscious is not playing games. Think I'm kidding? I can show you pics of my ideal wedding dress, outline the ceremony I'd like, the amount of people I'm willing to feed at a reception, the length of a honeymoon, the amount of kids I'd like to have, their names, and the general timeframe that I'd like to get them here.

Ring finger? Ashy.

I'm praying for patience, a cold shower, something that will keep me from completely turning my current relationship into a job interview and my already muddled brain into complete mush.

The View

I intentionally failed my eye exam in the third grade because I thought glasses were 'cool'.

Twenty-ish years later I'm sitting at my desk realizing that my already strong prescription may need to get even stronger.

Not cool.

I was a contacts girl ever since my mom signed off on them in high school. Before that I was burdened with some the most hideous frames known to man, which just completed the overly awkward late elementary/middle school years.

Most recently I bought some frames that I adore, but at the end of the day the thought that I'd be in some really serious sh*t if I lost/broke my glasses midday freaks me out.

For those of you that can/do function without your glasses/contacts this post isn't for you. This is for anyone who can't see their face clearly when brushing their teeth. Yep. Thats me.

I've considered LASIK, but have apprehensions (side effects, cost, the fact that it's eye surgery, etc). Until it's time for me to purchase contacts, cleaner, rewetting drops, frames, lenses, glasses cases, contact cases, regular eye drops et. al. and I realize that I've probably paid for LASIK a million times over already.

I need to figure something out asap.

Whoa

I am in the foulest of moods.

I haven't been this bad in ages.

I just need to make it to 4pm Friday.

First 10 Thoughts

1. Wow my alarm is loud, the second one is even louder.

2. Thank God I'm up and I feel a bit better.

3. LC comes today(!!!!!), time for a good morning call.

4. Nyquil has my dreams on a totally different level. Inception was such good movie and I'm glad I have a perfect complex dream sequence reference point. The dream was so inception-esque.

5. Let me check my twitter feed. I should blog these thoughts.

6. Hmmm LC sounds great in the morning.

7. Wow I feel so much better than I did yesterday morning.

8. Two days left of work and then I get to do nothing.

9. I wonder if I should be taking cold medicine or allergy medicine for my head cold.

10. Hmm the sun is looking different these days....is the time change coming up?

After Amen

Ok I'm here.

Job? Check. Apartment? Check. Relationship? Check.

Now what?

Figuring out what to do with a blessing can be as exhausting as the blessing itself. What's next?

Lets see what we're working with....

I'm really excited about LC's visit this weekend.

How and ever.....I'm too sick/tired to do anything in anticipation of his visit.

Moreover, I can honestly say that I'm going to try to redefine "knocked out" for a better part of the 48 hour period.

Two months in and it'll be unvarnished Dani.....

Lets see how this plays out.

Ramblings: Quick and Dirty pt. 2

1. Mom had an amazing time and I'm glad she came to visit.

2. As a result of her visit I'm exhausted, sick, and broke....(it's like a post homecoming feeling).

3. Speaking of homecoming...I love that I'm dating a HU man.

4. Sooo excited about Charlotte...thanks for the suggestions!

5. I keep forgetting about my forthcoming bday. Bring on Sept!!!